Hot Lists Sunday, October 22nd

6 DIY Halloween costumes that only people from Herefordshire would get

Hot Lists Sunday, October 22nd

6 DIY Halloween costumes that only people from Herefordshire would get

So you’ve been talked in to doing Halloween this year.

You’re going to a costume party, or you're doing a squad night out, and the closest thing you’ve got to fancy-dress is a plastic pumpkin mask from last year that still smells vaguely of beer and Doritos.

Don't worry, we’re here to help.

These days, there are basically two types of people when it comes to Halloween. There are those people who will happily spend a month's salary on some Game Of Thrones-level transformation, weeks in the making, and then there's the rest of us who will likely be staring at the same leftover Werewolf hands and 80s wigs in the jokeshop on Thursday night, trying to convince yourself that 'yeh, I guess this could be something...

There's nothing wrong with half-arsing it. But the key is getting maximum reaction from the absolute minimum amount of effort. It doesn't even have to be scary. Take it from the celebs. Just find something funny/vaguely pop-culture-y, and if you must, add a squirt of fake blood to make it Scary Donald Trump.

But if you don't want to be yet another Spooky/Sexy Daenerys Targaryen stumbling around Hereford on Saturday night, here are a few creative DIY costumes with a local spin. 

(If you need some last minute Halloween plans - or something to do this weekend that has absolutely nothing to do with pumpkins or fake blood, check out our Weekend Roundup here)

LIVELINEBREAK3

 1. An off-duty SAS soldier

5

Yes, it would be easy to get out the camo paint, grab a green tee from Primark and go all Rambo, but everyone who lives in Hereford knows that’s not what SAS boys look like. They look like this.

  • Rab/Belstaff jacket zipped up, dark, straight cut jeans, expensive-looking wristwatch
  • Short back and sides
  • Well-kept Timberland boots
  • Accessorize with: Scottish accent (optional)

If anyone asks what you are: “Yeh sorry, I can’t tell you what I do.”

 

2. A Herefordshire Young Farmer

4

  • Guys: Striped shirt with a large collar, worn with three buttons undone. Girls: polo shirt, tucked in, collar up. Gilet. Pearls over the polo
  • Bootcut jeans
  • Slip-on, black ‘going-out’ boots
  • Accessorise with: blow-up sheep, bottle of Jaeger, references to 'last year's AGM'

If anyone asks who you are: Deflect by challenging them to a Strawpeedo race with a couple of VK Blues you have secluded in your back pockets.

 

3.  A Strongbow can

1

  • Strongbow logo shirt
  • Gold minishirt/short shorts
  • Ring pull made out of cardboard, wrapped in tin foil, affixed to a hat/hairband
  • A delicious can/crate of Strongbow

If anyone asks what you are: Tell them, "They were all out of White Lightning costumes at the shop." 

 

4.  An Out of Competition Bodybuilder (who has never actually competed)

Bodybuilder

  • Full-arm sleeve tattoo (biro’d on). Must inc at least one ‘melting clockface’
  • A deep V tee. Cut extra deep if nec, and shave/oil the revealed section of pectoral. (Can be subbed out for a NBA jersey provided you have no clue about basketball or even what team it is.
  • Black/faded skinny jeans w/ designer rips in. Must stop short of the ankle and be worn without socks.
  • Box-fresh pair of Nike Roshe’s or equivalent.
  • Accessorize with a copy of Men’s Health rolled in up in one back pocket, and jar of Aminos in the other

If anyone asks what you are: “I’m currently in a strength cycle but I’ll be looking to cut in a few weeks.”

5.  Ronnie Radford

3

  • Long sleeved white tee with number 11 drawn on the back with a marker pen/Sharpie
  • Black short shorts, white socks pulled up
  • 70’s wig with the front hacked up with a pair of scissors until it looks like a bad comb over

If anyone asks who you are: Say nothing, but boot the nearest drink/cushion/annoying co-worker as hard as you can and wheel off with both arms above your head in celebration. 

 

6. Bull puns (various)

7

  • Buy a cheap bull costume from Amazon
  • Think up a hilarious pun using the word bull, and accessorize appropriately

-          For example:

Ballet shoes and a lump of coal = BULLy Elliot

Stilettos and oversized sunglasses = Naomi CampBULL

Aviator sunglasses, a cigar and the kind of glue-on goatee that American teenagers used to think looked good in the ‘90s = Hispanic rapper and celebrity creep, PitBULL.

 

7. Someone from Leominster

2

  • This one’s easy. Just wear your normal clothes but tape a few extra, fake fingers to your hand*

 

(I love Leominster, it's beautiful town and I recognise some stereotypes about the place probably aren't true, mon. Please don't @ me on Twitter.)

 

Do you want to write for Herefordshire Live? Get in touch on Facebook, Twitter or say hello@herefordshirelive.co.uk